The Very Unfortunate Man
Song composer(s)
Traditional / Driftwood, Jimmy
Grateful Dead Recordings
Not recorded by the Dead
Dead Related Recordings
No Dead related recordings entered
Other Recordings
Battle Of New Orleans : Jimmy Driftwood (1958)
Chad Mitchell Trio At The Bitter End : Chad Mitchell Trio (196?)
Garland Of American Folk Song : Barry Toelken (196?)
Best Of Jimmy Driftwood : Jimmy Driftwood (197?)
Reunion Part 2 : Chad Mitchell Trio (1997)Performance History
Played by an unnamed bluegrass band with Garcia on banjo at an unknown venue in Burlingame in January 1962.
Not performed by the Grateful Dead. Occurs only on pre-Dead tapes featuring future members of the dead.
Notes
Authorship uncertain. The traditional song The Unfortunate Man, which dates back to at least the end of the 19th century, describes, in usually a humorous fashion, the misfortunes of a a young man courting his sweetheart. Here's a couple of verses from one recorded version;
I once had a sweetheart, she said she'd be mine,
Of course I thought she was almost divine,
But another young fellow one day did return,
So she made up her mind to hide me in a churn.I'm a very unfortunate, a very unfortunate,
Really, I'm a very unfortunate man.Her mother then come into the room,
Said she had so much cream she would have to churn it up soon,
She poured it right onto me out of the pan,
Which left me indeed an unfortunate man.I'm a very unfortunate, a very unfortunate,
Really, I'm a very unfortunate man.This traditional tune was reworked / parodied, possibly by Jimmy Driftwood, as The Very Unfortunate Man and it is this song that is performed on the Burlingame tape. This song is sometimes referred to as The Warranty Deed. On circulating copies of the Burlingame tape it is usually listed as Wealthy Old Maid.
The first two lines of the song are missing on the tape;
(....two lines missing)The two lines that are missing on tape are as follows in other versions of the song;
At last of starvation he grew so afraid,
That he courted and married a wealthy old maid.At the wedding the lawyer made one big mistake,
'Twas not in omitting the wine or the cake,
The ring was well chosen, they had a big feed,
But the lawyer did not get a warranty deed.At night in their chamber the lady arose,
And began to prepare to retire and repose,
Her husband stood near her admiring her charms,
That gave him such pleasure to hold in his arms.She went to the washstand to bathe her fair face,
And thus she destroyed all her beauty and grace,
The rose on her cheek quickly grew faint,
When he saw on the towel, 'twas nothing but paint.He's a very unfortunate, very unfortunate, very unfortunate man.
She went to the mirror to take down her hair,
And when she had done so her scalp was all bare,
Said she, don't be frightened to see my bald head,
I'll put on a cap when I get into bed.She hung her false hair on the wall on a peg,
And then she proceeded to take off her leg,
Her quivering husband felt sure he would die,
When she asked him to come and take out her glass eye.He's a very unfortunate, very unfortunate, very unfortunate man.
Her husband was biting his quivering lips,
While she removed her counterfeit hips,
Just then her false nose clattered down to the floor,
And the poor lawyer, screaming, ran out of the door.Now all you young men who would marry for life,
Be sure to examine your intended wife,
Remember the lawyer who trusted his eyes,
And a little bit later got quite a surprise.He's a very unfortunate, very unfortunate, very unfortunate man.
There was a lawyer, his name was Clay
He had but two clients and they wouldn't pay